Jim Caldwell, a former head coach of the Detroit Lions, discovered a powerful way to encourage his daughter during her collegiate sports years. He would write her notes adorned with short Scripture verses, occasionally adding a little cash. Jim hoped that his daughter would at least cast a quick glance at the note before being lured by the money. On a visit to her, he was pleasantly surprised to find the Scripture verses carefully displayed on her playing shoes. But what melted his heart even more was when he walked into her apartment and saw every single note he had ever sent, carefully affixed to the back of her bedroom door.
When our daughters face challenging days, they will always find solace in our encouraging words. A letter from a father to his daughter is a special and lasting treasure. It doesn’t have to be lengthy; regardless of its length, it is something she can keep and cherish forever. To help you get started, here are ten heartfelt messages to pen in a letter to your daughter (and make sure to keep a copy for yourself):
1. “I love you from the depths of my heart.”
Expressions of love can never be too frequent. The more parents convey their love, the more deeply it is appreciated. When a daughter is confident in her father’s unwavering affection, she is less likely to seek love in all the wrong places.
2. “I believe in you.”
It’s not enough to simply state, “I believe in you.” Explain why you believe in her:
- You’re my daughter, and I love you.
- You’re intelligent.
- I trust you.
- You’re a hard worker.
- Your faith grounds you.
3. “You are beautiful, inside and out.”
Again, this is about instilling a fundamental confidence in her identity. Let her know that you see the beauty that radiates from within her. Just like her mother, she will grow up to be every bit as beautiful as you say she is.
4. “You make me proud in countless ways.”
Communicate how much her presence in your life means to you. Highlight specific instances that have made your heart swell with pride:
- The compassion you show towards others fills me with joy.
- Your dedication in completing projects and your helpfulness at home.
- The impeccable manners you display towards others.
- The responsibility you exhibit in managing your allowance.
No fabrication necessary; simply affirm the positive attributes you observe.
5. “Let me share my most treasured values.”
Open up to your daughter about the core principles that guide your life. Teaching values from the heart requires additional effort. Tell her:
“I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned this, but money has never been a priority for me. My family is my treasure. I deeply love your mother, and you and your brother mean more to me than anything else in the world. My faith in God is the foundation on which I stand, and being part of a faith community has transformed our lives. You may not realize it, but I turned down a significant promotion when you were little just so we could remain in this community where we feel loved, and where you have formed lasting friendships.”
6. “Let me recount the day of your birth.”
Even if you’re not an accomplished writer, you can still share the emotions you experienced when she was born:
- I shed tears of joy when I first held you in my arms.
- I prayed for you every day during those nine months of anticipation, and my prayers have not ceased since.
- From the moment of your birth, you captivated us with your beauty.
- Because of you, my love for your mother has multiplied tenfold.
7. “Never settle for less than the best.”
You have been teaching her this lesson all along, but it’s crucial to reinforce it in this letter. Parents desire the very best for their children, but it’s time for her to take ownership of this value. Encourage her to:
- Utilize her unique talents.
- Treat her body with respect.
- Choose a life partner who loves her just as you do.
Explain the reasoning behind these choices: she was created in love and with a purpose. She was meant to live and love to the fullest, and that requires nothing less than the best.
8. “Sometimes my love for you fills me with fear.”
Be open about how your love for her can sometimes make you cautious. Let her know that prospective boyfriends will have to pass your inspection, not because you don’t trust her, but because you love her. Explain that you long for her to call and text when she’s away from home because your heart aches when you can’t reach out and hold her hand. Share that you sometimes need her reassurance. Allow yourself to be vulnerable.
9. “You can always count on me, no matter what, to help you navigate life’s challenges.”
Whether she is a child or a teenager, it’s crucial that your daughter understands that your love for her knows no bounds. Make it clear that she can always confide in you, even if she finds herself in trouble. Assure her that you are willing to assist her in formulating a plan. Let her know that you will always answer her calls and lend an attentive ear whenever she needs to talk.
10. “Now, I want to open my heart to you.”
Only you know what words to write in this section. However, ensure that you share from the depths of your soul. If you are a person of faith, elaborate on what your faith means to you. If you have a poignant tale that illustrates your relationship with your own parents, share it here. If you are a poet, pen a verse. Do you have a song that embodies the essence of your soul? Quote it here. This is the moment to be truly authentic.
Remember, a heartfelt letter to your daughter is a lasting testament of your love. As she journeys through life, she will always have your encouraging words to lean on, providing her with the strength and guidance she needs.